Ireland Confs
20:49 * Disgust (CONF): Ugh, I'm not going to stand for this. 20:49 * Disgust (CONF): Everyone is literally beginning to make me sick. 20:49 * Disgust (CONF): I mean, whoever said that plaid went with denim shorts? No one! 20:50 * Disgust (CONF): Ugh, Oscar de la Renta is rolling in his grave. 20:55 * Disgust (CONF): EW EW EW EW EW I'M WITH THE SNAIL. 20:40 (CONF): The King of the Koopas is HERE! And this game will be MINE! Just gotta use my killer combination of super genius and brawny Koopitude to pummel these losers. 20:47 (CONF): SHNARFL? BLAARGH! Peach is FEISTY today! Ol' Bowser needs to start fattening up. 20:40 My people have sent me to find the chosen one! Only then will I be allowed to go back.... if I fail, I'll be stranded. 20:46 ((The Canadian overlord.)) 20:54 If you have not yet noticed, I am an almond. 20:55 And we almonds are the most perfect being that exists in the known world. 20:55 I came here not for the money, but to send a warning. 20:55 Almonds are superior to humans, and that is not a question. That is a fact. 20:55 First an almond will win this game, then we will absorb all the water on earth. 20:55 Nothing can get in our collective way. 21:04 My strategy to start this game will be to be very straightforward and earn people's trusts. 21:04 I already have Bowsers. 21:07 Audrey appears to be spreading rumors about our tribe. 21:07 That is such a petty humanish thing to do. 21:07 She will have to go. 20:56 CONF: Ugh Bowser... I thought I'd finally get to escape, but no! He follows me here... what a loser! He has nothing better to do than THREATEN lonely princesses!? 20:57 CONF: When will this guy just leave!? Hasn't Mario defeated him enough times... 20:58 CONF: I can't believe I've aged so well, especially after all these years of dealing with Bowser! Can you imagine the stress! OH Mario... 21:07 CONF: Oh that Bowser, he just won't STOP! 21:09 CONF: Hold on... I'm dealing with Bowser! Too busy to vote right now! Ohhhh.... 20:56 CONF: I'm laughing on the inside because Hector's tribe consists of guys with dicks and a girl that used to have one. *cackles* 21:01 CONF: My team sucks. Shia should be ashamed. Kamek is a moron. 21:03 CONF: Riley is SO thirsty ugh. Go get some water bitch. 21:08 CONF: I have to go to that racist turtle thing. This is just so retarded. Like, Shia is a moron and apparently the tribe loves him even though he SUCKS. 20:58 Confessional: Curses! I am separated from my master! What will I ever do now? Oh, of course, run my tribe! Ha! 21:00 CONF: As a rich woman, I don't need the money, but I would love the experience of getting to compete. I just hope that no one will be doing ANY dirty doings while I'm around. 21:04 (CONF): My strategy right now is plant a seed of doubt to every single person on my tribe that another wants them out or has spoken badly about them. From there, I can play on these lies and use them to my advantage. 21:04 Every queen needs their loyal henchmen <3 21:09 * MotivationalShia exhales quietly 21:09 Everything happens...so much. 21:09 Today I saw a fire within our opponents. 21:09 They have become better than us. 21:10 I spent my time trying to strengthen a group, and in the process, I was too late for a challenge. 21:10 And now we must be torn down. 21:10 Perhaps it symbolizes something deeper within the subconscious. Kamek_ Confessional: Curses! We lost! I am angry because of this, my arch-nemisis CROCKER is beating me! I shall show him. Kamek_ Confessional: I am in some alliance called Light Warriors, I am NOT a light warrior, but I shall take it! Ha! I am a mastermind! 20:47 (CONF): SHNARFL? BLAARGH! Peach is FEISTY today! Ol' Bowser needs to start fattening up. 21:12 (CONF): I recruited a new minion today! It's that almond guy. He's small and kinda dumb-looking, but he's got dedication! And that's all I need at this point! Gwarharharhar! 21:13 * Disgust (CONF): So like, I'm becoming pretty close with Audrey, but then Almy told me she was saying I'm the biggest threat and need to go. 21:14 * Disgust (CONF): And I was like, that is so disgusting. Like what kind of galpal just betrays you like that. 21:14 * Disgust (CONF): So I tried to talk to Audrey and she was like no, you're not the target. Crocker is and then we should throw the challenge. 21:14 * Disgust (CONF): Like, how risky and risque. 21:12 At this point I believe I have the trust of Bowser and Disgust. 21:12 Two weak-minded beings compared to an almond such as myself. 21:15 Audrey is rather transparently trying to flatter me and gain my trust. 21:15 Another strike against her in my book. 21:17 Frosti Zernow is my idol gues 21:11 Riley - Oh... I'm just going to go with this! It's the best option right now, once I get Bowser off my back then I'll have more time to think about things like this! Seriously, he keeps sending me love letters!!! 21:15 CONF: Ohh Mario.. you're a total slob and I hate your guts, but sometimes you're a pretty cool guy! Especially when it comes to dealing with Bowser… 21:11 CONF: I'm like 90% sure I'm going home since my tribe sucks. I gotta kick it into overdrive to make sure these morons don't act with their empty heads. 21:12 Confessional: Curses! I am separated from my master! What will I ever do now? Oh, of course, run my tribe! Ha! 21:12 Confessional: Curses! We lost! I am angry because of this, my arch-nemisis CROCKER is beating me! I shall show him. 21:12 Confessional: I am in some alliance called Light Warriors, I am NOT a light warrior, but I shall take it! Ha! I am a mastermind! 21:13 Confessional: They seem to be targeting Riley, it is unfortunate for her. But I am a mastermind therefore I shall be taking this opportunity! HAHAHAHAHA! 21:17 --ep 2-- 21:17 Confessional: HAHA! I pulled off a SUCCESSFUL BLINDSIDE! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA 21:10 CONF: I formed the light warriors on my team because I saw that there were many people close to the light. I plan to go all the way with Realta, Kamek, Peach, and Shia! 21:18 wow 21:18 I'm really insulted, and like hurt. 21:18 At this moment in time. 21:18 I feel blindsided 21:18 heartbroken 21:18 hurt 21:18 and everything in between. 21:18 CONF: Yeah so my tribe sucks. Riley's gone, Shia's a fucking idiot who said I'm like a cancer to the tribe. Like, go get a paper bag over your head, or better yet make it plastic. 21:19 Kamek and Peach are obviously like in an alliance and nobody wants to see it which sucks. 21:19 And then like who the fuck are Primrose and Realta? 21:21 Confessional: Bowser really is the ladies man! I am surprised as usually he marries people against their will! Oh well, tenth time is the charm, I suppose? 21:48 Confessional: HAHA! THANKS TO MY BRILLIANT SMARTS MY TEAM OFFICIALLY WON THIS CHALLENGE! GO ME! GO ME! I AM THE BEST! HA! 21:25 My team has many people who could be the chosen one! They are all very noble 21:27 * Disgust (CONF) Looks like we can't throw this challenge. 21:35 CONF: Legit hate my tribe. They don't do shit for challenges and then whine and complain. 21:48 CONF: So Shia invited me to an alliance with everyone but those Mario morons. Fine with me. 21:48 CONF: never mind Kamek is there 21:48 I will allow, this round, for Bowser to decide who we eliminate. 21:48 This is simply so he feels that he is in charge. 21:48 Nobody will realize that a mere almond is pulling the strings. 21:48 I say "mere" ironically, of course. 21:49 The idol clue refers to Erik Huffman. 21:49 This much is obvious. 21:49 I sit here in a field today. 21:49 Nothing is clear to me. 21:49 Why is there racism? 21:49 Why are there threats? 21:20 CONF: Well now with Bowser off my back... I can focus on the better things in life!!! It won't be the same though... what is the world without Bowser pursuing me and Mario saving me time after time!? 21:42 CONF: And just when I thought I finally had Bowser out of my hair, guess what he does!? He tries to kidnap me while I'm walking on the beach!? ISN'T KIDNAPPING ILLEGAL!? 21:42 CONF: *sighs* ...What a liar! But oh of course, it's to be expected! 21:52 CONF: This beach is so lovely! Reminds me of home... I have a little pond outside my house and it's so pretty! But Toad has to clean it daily with Mario and Luigi marching through it! Urgh, their dirty ass shoes... 21:57 CONF: Bowser is such a creep? O-O HOW DOES EVERYONE ELSE NOT SEE IT. O-O 21:58 CONF: Where I come from, he's the most dastardly and reviled tyrant EVER! -_- 21:58 CONF: Ohhh... things are sure different around here! Not sweet! 22:01 CONF: When will Mario get here and kick Bowser's ass? :( Tired of waiting! 21:25 My team has many people who could be the chosen one! They are all very noble 21:50 With each passing day the options are growing. Who is the chosen one? Who will save my people 21:52 Disgust is being problematic, and sadly my alliance with Bowser also attaches me to Audrey. 21:52 I vote for Denzel. Too unstable. Illogical. 21:54 I also am working on a "bond" with Hector. 21:54 I put quotations around "bond" because almonds have no bonds to non-almonds. 21:54 It's all about the betterment of almond-kind. 21:55 21:53 I vote for Denzel. Too unstable. Illogical. 21:49 The world should not be soft, spineless, like a dead jellyfish, but it should be...something. 21:50 The backbreaking spinelessness of our society completely complements the fact that everyone around is treated as a threat. 21:50 If we just learned to endure pain 21:50 maybe we could be better people. 21:50 LaBeouf out. 21:56 Honestly, I think my #INTRODUCTIONS video came off a bit too hard for some people. 21:56 They weren't ready to accept some of the things I said. 21:56 But by God, they needed to be. 22:01 * MotivationalShia shuts eyes hard and brings hands together 22:01 * MotivationalShia squats slightly 22:01 I want to love you madly. 22:01 I want to fuck you like an animal. 22:01 I want to be your baby. 22:02 Come with me. 22:02 * MotivationalShia breaks out of character, nods confidently and walks away 21:51 * Bowser| (CONF): Audrey thinks she's playing me? HAW! Ol' Bowser's got some tricks up his scaly sleeve! 21:57 (CONF): At this point, Disgust wants to leave. If I can make her unhappy enough here, I will just get her to quit and further myself another place. Denzel going home is just icing on the cake. 21:58 The team isn't trusting me, and it really hurts bro. Everyone thinks I'm in denial about being gay. They call me "Homo_Hector" that isn't me man. That just isn't me... like, I'm nothing like my dads. You know? One's a peanut salesman down in Georgia and one's a penis salesman up in New York and neither want anything to do with me. I don't wanna be like them man, I'm straight bro. Totally straight. 22:04 CONF: I GUESS I'll just take matters into my own hands... thank god I brought these gloves so I don't get my hands dirty! 22:09 Confessional: Shia is quite the challenge beast! He shall be a good ally for my DASTARDLY DEEDS! HAHA! 22:03 That vote went shockingly smoothly, despite Disgust's outburst. 22:03 I think she was the only person who voted against the majority, so she's painted a large target on her back 22:03 Figuratively. 22:03 Not literally. 22:03 Almonds have quite an understanding of metaphors and such. 22:16 Well, Audrey 22:16 Way to sign your own death warrant. 22:16 Death by almond is not pleasant. 22:16 But it is inevitable. 22:19 Sadly, she also has an idol. 22:19 This may be tough. 22:12 * MotivationalShia lays down on the ground 22:29 Confessional: GRR I AM ANGRY I LOST, HOW COULD YOU BOWSER HOW COULD YOU! 22:29 Confessional: Oh well it is time to MASTERMIND another boot HAHA! 22:32 Confessional: HAHA! PEACH WILL NOT SEE THIS COMING! Master Bowser may be angry, but I AM THE NEW EVIL HAHAHA! 22:36 --ep 5-- 22:36 Confessional: YELLOW IS MY FAVORITE COLOR 22:23 Audrey is trying to regain my trust. 22:24 I will pretend she did, but really plan to get her out at my next chance. 22:23 I don't really know how to feel today. 22:23 If we win today...we could just grow weaker. 22:23 There could be feuds, still, and I could be cast-aside before we flow together into merge, like sperm and egg. 22:30 I don't know when the merge will be. 22:30 This is an emotionally frustrating decision, to be honest. 22:28 (CONF): That motivational lame-o has a severe case of BowserJealousyitis. 21:58 The team isn't trusting me, and it really hurts bro. Everyone thinks I'm in denial about being gay. They call me "Homo_Hector" that isn't me man. That just isn't me... like, I'm nothing like my dads. You know? One's a peanut salesman down in Georgia and one's a penis salesman up in New York and neither want anything to do with me. I don't wanna be like them man, I'm straight bro. Totally straight. 22:40 I think Shia Labeouf isn't interested in me... fucking hell. This is a great opportunity and I'm blowing it! Just like I blew Chad in the locker room last year. 22:36 Confessional: YELLOW IS MY FAVORITE COLOR 22:38 Confessional: Excellent, jury! I can be EVIL for the rest of the game guaranteed! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHHA! 22:43 Confessional: So I am in a final three with Bowser and Audrey, EXCELLENT. 22:43 Confessional: I am also in a final three with Shia and Jacinta. EXCELLENT 22:43 I am in three alliances right now. 22:43 I have equal amounts of loyalty to each: little. 22:44 Right now I want the first target to be Primrose. 22:44 I have no shot of ever really controlling her, so she's expendable to me. 22:42 CONF: I have to admit, Peach getting voted out did feel like a betrayal. But I have recouped, and forgiven in the name of the lord, so now me, Shia, Kamek, Audrey, and Snail are the new lightwarriors, headed to the final five! 22:50 Confessional: Curses we all lost immunity! 22:58 Confessional: Jacinta is making my FLIPPING MASTERMINDING easier! Hurrah! 23:03 CONF: Fuck yes. That bitch Prim is out of here! What sucks though is now my tribe is down to 3 people and I don't really trust anyone on the other side. Luckily I still have my idol and don't give a shit about any of these people! ^_^ 22:45 Audrey is still the person I'm most worried about, but I want to weaken the other tribe first, so I can get the stragglers to aid me in eliminating her. 22:51 Hector has infiltrated an alliance on the other side with Jacinta, Shia, and Kamek. 22:51 I underestimated him.. 22:51 Hopefully Primrose will go uneventfully. 22:55 I'm honestly quite disgusted at the degree to which I'm being disregarded. 22:55 Do these people not know the power of an almond? 22:56 Do they not realize that I am far more intelligent than the rest of them combined? 22:56 Do they not realize that I care not for any of them, and will destroy each and every single one of them one by one? 22:56 Yeah, they don't. 22:58 Jacinta seems loud and confrontational. That's a variable almonds know nothing of, so it must be removed. 22:58 Next round, perhaps. 22:52 My social game has never quite been the best. 22:52 But it's always been worth a fraction of something, I think. 22:53 As much as I want to come out of this with a win--I want to come out of this with a new me, a new everyone. 23:05 Confessional: That was WONDERFUL I just MASTERMINDED that vote. I am good! 23:20 Confessional: I told Jacinta to use her idol tonight because people are going after her! And I am keeping myself save with my alliance as I told Jacinta I am getting info for us! Foolproof! 23:04 CONF: Snail is so annoying, asking for a fight. Like, come at me bro. I'm not afraid of a little snail with no friends. 23:04 If we get her out, we may be able to bring Shia into the Heterbros alliance. 23:04 That name is illogical to me, by the way. 23:04 Hector is super gay. 23:16 Audrey can't participate in the next challenge. That leaves an opening to possibly betray her. 23:16 We will see. 23:15 I was bold. 23:15 I was ambitious, and I think it was worth it. 23:15 In the end, all of this really matters equivalent to how much you want it. 23:15 I'm a fabulous millionaire. I could afford to binge a bit. 21:51 * Bowser| (CONF): Audrey thinks she's playing me? HAW! Ol' Bowser's got some tricks up his scaly sleeve! 22:28 (CONF): That motivational lame-o has a severe case of BowserJealousyitis. 23:17 (CONF): Peach is gone, but I still have my designated eye candy of Audrey! I'm SET! Gwarharhar! 23:35 Confessional: This isn't according to plan! 23:25 CONF: I'm taking a HUGE risk tonight... Let's pray it plays off. 23:16 Audrey can't participate in the next challenge. That leaves an opening to possibly betray her. 23:16 We will see. 23:25 Heard the other side was voting for me, negotiating them to get the votes on Snail. 23:25 Just in case. 23:47 Confessional: Wow! That went perfectly. Now part 3 of my perfect plan is coming into fruition. Muahaha! 23:52 Confessional: Curses! No immunity, this does put part three into fruition though! I now can eliminate Hector! HAHA! 23:17 (CONF): Peach is gone, but I still have my designated eye candy of Audrey! I'm SET! Gwarharhar! 23:47 (CONF): Peach AND Audrey? A... A poor Koopa like me c-c-can't... handle this... 23:57 CONF: I'm 90% sure I'm getting votes tonight, and like 50/50 on if I'm getting backstabbed. 23:57 I hope my instincts are wrong for once. 23:47 Confessional: Wow! That went perfectly. Now part 3 of my perfect plan is coming into fruition. Muahaha! 23:52 Confessional: Curses! No immunity, this does put part three into fruition though! I now can eliminate Hector! HAHA! 23:54 Confessional: I love the idea of a plan fleshing out perfectly. It makes me tear up. :’) 22:40 I think Shia Labeouf isn't interested in me... fucking hell. This is a great opportunity and I'm blowing it! Just like I blew Chad in the locker room last year. 23:57 I've lied to everyone man, I'm stuck. I don't see any way for me to win. Once Bowser is gone, I'm gone. And I deserve it. What I'm doing to Snail tonight man, it sucks. It sucks that I have to do this. 00:13 CONF: I'm considering giving this final idol to Bowser since I did promise I would before. And like, why not? No one has to know I gave it to him, and then I don't have to actually backstab Shia. 00:17 CONF: And of course someone has to ruin my entire plan and vote Snail. Just fucking great. 00:10 Confessional: Well, Bowser is gonna be gone tonight, which is sad, but it has to happen! Plus he'll vote for me in the end guaranteed! Fantastic! 00:12 I am thinking about who I want to sit next to, honestly. 00:12 It could be Jacinta, but I feel like she'd win, no problem. 00:12 It's definitely not Bowser, though. 00:17 Confessional: What the…? 00:12 (CONF): At least... At least it wasn't Mario. 00:19 Confessional: Sometimes you have to make power moves, so here we go! 00:21 CONF: I feel so shitty having to actually vote Shia out. Like even though he sucked he's gotten better and it sucks that I'm the reason he's out. Like.... Fuck. 00:24 Confessional: That was a hard boot, but I made the right choice. 00:24 Confessional: EVIL stops for nobody! Muahaha! 00:31 Confessional: Curses! Oh well, I guess we still have Snail to fall back on. 00:50 Confessional: Well I was gonna vote out Bowser if I won, but I guess now I have to hope he doesn't hate me! Haha! 00:50 Confessional: I can still win this maybe.